The Real World ... Blogger Style: 03/01/2004 - 04/01/2004

Wednesday, March 31, 2004

Who wants these dishes?

Hi guys! I hate to say this... But I think it's for the best if I move out of The House. I just don't seem to have the time anymore. I can scarcely keep my own site updated, much less have the added guilt of ignoring this one.

You guys are the BEST. Period. I'll be lurking around the Hot Tub periodically, if I'm welcome. Boz, thanks for the great experiment!

Love 'ya,
Mike Martin (The Hard Artist)

Pool Weather

Roses have bloomed by the pool!

I've named the pink one on the left "Belle"
And the two red ones on the right are "Sandra1" and "Sandra2".

And...Dang, I hate to exclude anybody.
I think I've started something that might be difficult to finish.

I guess "Boz" is the hose, "Dvl" is the diving board.

And...umm...the light there in the rose bed? That's "Hard Artist" because it's metal and therefore hard.

Off camera, there are 2 inflatable water wings floating around - "Zann" and "Mike".

There's a snorkle that will hereby be known as "Zoot".

When I look in the water, I call my reflection "Marci" since she's my doppleganger.

Damn...what else is there? I've bit off more than I could chew.

Well, there's an empty beer bottle that I'll have to name "Gooseneck" since there's no tequila.

And "The Bored Housewife" is what I shall call the barbecue grill (but not out loud in front of the house owners).

And "Jonnie" is, of course, me.
I need to go buy beer.

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Tonight, in the hot tub

11pm est, 10pm cst, 9pm mst, 8pm pst.

I bought these at the dollar store the other day.

Maybe I should have a contest and this could be the grand prize.

Meet the Dumb Bunnies. Mama Bunny loves her sunglasses. Papa Bunny loves his great big underpants. Baby Bunny loves to watch his family in their own TV show

Tuesday, March 30, 2004

I am the king of useless links!!

Purchase of the Day

at the Dollar Store.

Monday, March 29, 2004

Since the zonk isn't working

Please feel free to join me in the hot tub.

I feel the need to post

However, i have not yet been able to get into the groove of posting here...
had you noticed??
it's like...
i say everything i need to say (and thensome!) on my own site, so when i think about posting here...
well, i got nothin' left.

what's my problem??
i guess if i can ramble on incessantly there, i ought to be able to do it here.
i mean, what's the point of living here if i'm not even going to stink up the place with garlic and post-gym-feet??
I'm certainly not here for the free beer--cuz there never is any.
and i don't venture to think i'd be here for the peace and quiet, cuz you guys are all more trouble than 6 sets of mini-tornado twins....
i guess that just leaves the skankiness of the hot tub sessions...
but i haven't been in on one of those in a while so i almost forgot.
anyway, what's my friggin point?

oh yeah, as usual i don't have one.
well graaaaaaaand.

i loved everyone's refelction pictures!
and of course i thought of a great one today.
day late and a dollar short?
how's about a week past due and a zero shy of the target?
that's me.

i hope you all had a fabulous monday.
remind me to post again soon--this was fun.
well, it was slightly better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick, at least.

Which Weird Latin Phrase Are You?

If you only knew the power of the dark side.
Postatem obscuri lateris nescitis.
"You do not know the power of the Dark
Side." There are two possibilities: you
are a Star Wars geek, or you are unreasoningly

Which Weird Latin Phrase Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Saturday, March 27, 2004

Dvl at the office

By all accounts she had a hectic week.

Dubious Taste Picture Post Saturday

Yes or no?

Zoot's theory of Relativity (fudged a bit for your reading pleasure)

In order to understand educational corruption you need to realize that everything is controlled by a following made up of people who think Steven Tyler is sexy with help from Zoot and Zann.

The conspiracy first started during a rock concert in an undisclosed location (we could tell you but we'd have to kill you.). They have been responsible for many events throughout history, including Marilyn Monroe's skirt incident.

Today, members of the conspiracy are everywhere. They can be identified by squealing and panting pledges of undying devotion.

They want to beat the Rolling Stones and imprison resisters in boz's septic tank using little blue boats.

In order to prepare for this, we all must pass a law. Since the media is controlled by Christian music we should get our information from Aerosmith.

Goose's Conspiracy Theory

In order to understand that Bigfoot exists you need to realize that everything is controlled by the Fire Monkeys of Bora Bora made up of Jewish librarians with help from the eternally wicked.

The conspiracy first started during the Kent State tragedy in Morocco. They have been responsible for many events throughout history, including Washington crossing the Delaware.

Today, members of the conspiracy are everywhere. They can be identified by the picking of the nose and eating it.

They want to bludgeon lil' skater dude and imprison resisters in dungeons using trains.

In order to prepare for this, we all must quit our jobs. Since the media is controlled by The planet of the Apes we should get our information from our local bartender.

The Real World ... Conspiracy Style

Create your own conspiracy theory.

Here is mine...
In order to understand group blogs you need to realize that everything is controlled by The Real World ... Blogger Style made up of the Amish with help from Toast eaters.
The conspiracy first started during The birth of boz in Iowa. They have been responsible for many events throughout history, including Boz geting cable modem.
Today, members of the conspiracy are everywhere. They can be identified by sneezing.
They want to monkey maul Jonnie and imprison resisters in Canada using ambulances.
In order to prepare for this, we all must sleep. Since the media is controlled by dvl we should get our information from The bored housewife.

Friday, March 26, 2004

Good news!

I Spy - Topic #1


Take a picture of a reflection of something. [eg. using a mirror, window, body of water, etc.]

Including yourself in the pic is encouraged, but not a requirement.

Post your photo to the blog on Monday morning, March 29, 2004.

A public apology

from belle to boz.

Mea culpa.

Thursday, March 25, 2004

Boz's Rebuttal

Jonnie's Post of the Day

I've got no comment to go with this, nothing to add.
It just makes me laugh.

Not sure why I find it so amusing, but I do.

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i will censor myself

except my kitty graphic will not be cute.

it's been a rough week!

I Spy With My Little Eye....

BLOGMATES GRAB YOUR DIGITAL CAMERAS because we've got a new weekly RWBS challenge!!

(Note: you can use either a digital camera, your webcam, your mobile phone camera, or you can scan in a pic taken in 35mm film)

The game will be played like I Spy -- every Friday a hint/topic to photograph will be revealed, and each blogmate will be required to post a photo in response on the following Monday (giving us the weekend to complete the task), and the result of which will be a photo essay of our collective efforts.

The 'assignments' will be broad enough in nature to accommodate all types of digital cameras (i.e., you can take the pics inside/outside with a digital camera or camera phone, or you can take the pics at home with your webcam). [For example, one hint/topic could be to take pics of something of a specific color like RED -- you could take and post a picture of red flowers, a pic of you in your favorite red shirt, a pic of someone with red hair, or even a pic of red lipstick stains on a napkin.]

The topics will be randomly chosen (and by 'random' I mean that each week a new letter of the name of our blog will be used to create a topic), and the first assignment will be posted this Friday.

Wednesday, March 24, 2004

Whoot Whoot!

Anybody up for a little Oral Disco?


this picture.

This is for everyone

who hasn't posted lately.

And one for 'Yo Mama too.

Great expectations

It promised so much... .

Tuesday, March 23, 2004

Obligatory Post #1


Monday, March 22, 2004

Everybody's got something to hide

'cept for me and my monkey ... tie.

Sunny Days, Everything's A-Ok

Today, today was not a good day. I was convinced all the forces of evil were working against me to crush my spirit and make me hate every person on this planet and maybe a few people on other planets, too, especially after the whole "Do you subscribe to the idea that ignorance is bliss?" repeat incident at the dentist and the race I got into with a 16 year old when all I wanted was to go to the goddamn store to buy some more Twizzlers!
But. Then something wonderful happened. My mailman, who I'm sure is just really busy and that's why he just left a package on my doorstep instead of ringing the bell, and not because he's afraid of me after I confessed I wanted to have his mail babies, brought me something wonderful.
A monkey.
A monkey from Michigan.
A monkey who answers to the name "Zob," a gift from the wonderful wizard of Boz.

And suddenly my day is all sunshiny and I feel like I do when it's Wednesday and there's a new episode of The West Wing on and Martin Sheen invites me to his house to watch it with him.
Yeah, it's a crappy picture from my webcam that couldn't begin to do this monkey justice, but until Jonnie sells his kidneys to buy me a digital camera, this is the best I can do.

Marci's Random Story of the Week!

One time in college, while I lived on the 4th floor, a friend came over to hang out and generally I would throw my keys out the window for him to catch to let himself in. Well I was feeling a bit nazi this day, and wanted him to earn the keys. This meant he had to catch a potato chip in his mouth before i would throw the keys down. Apparently it is hard to see where you are going when you are running with your mouth open facing straight up, and he ended up running into the brick wall with his teeth. He never made it up to my room because he had to rush to the dentist so fix his 2 front teeth that he had chipped in half. I guess he really didn't want to hang out with me.

The End.

The Greatest Blog Of All

I searched deep within my soul for a way to express how enriched my life has become since I made parole was invited to join The Real World Blogger Style, and I think Whitney sang it best, only not really, which is why I made a few slight changes. I'm sure Whitney won't mind, especially since she's a crack whore, and in my experience crack whores don't start many fights over the changing of lyrics to express any warm fuzziness one might feel towards their roommates. That's just my experience though. If she calls? I'm out of the country, adopting a baby in Guam with my husband Roberto. Thanks.

I believe the Real World Blogger Style roomies are our future
Teach them well and let them lead the way
Show them all the Tootie they possess inside
Give them a sense of pride to make it easier
Let the roomies' laughter remind us how we used to be
Everybody searching for a monkey
People need someone to look up to
I never found anyone to refill my meds
A lonely place to be
So I learned to depend on Boz

I decided long ago, never to blog in anyone's shadows
If I fail, if I succeed
At least I blog as I believe
No matter what they take from me
They can't take away my insanity
Because the greatest love of all
Is happening to me
I found the greatest love of all
Inside the hot tub
The greatest love of all
Is easy to achieve
Learning what a Posture Bar is
It is the greatest love of all

I believe the roomies are our future
Teach them well and let them lead the way
Show them all the nougaty goodness they possess inside
Give them a sense of pride to make it easier
Let the roomies' laughter remind us how we used to be


And if by chance, that special place
That you've been dreaming of
Leads you to a mental institution
Find your strength in zonk

If you were

a Sissy Spacek movie which one would you be?

I learned...

That it's possible to "dump" someone you've never met. And to do it without actually dumping them. Thanks, Marce. Love you too.

That it's possible for me to add one more thing to my life to feel guilty about (infrequent posting). Thanks, Boz.

That there are more quizzes floating around the internet than should be allowed by law.

That the house is always empty when I'm around. Coincidence?

That, although we may never meet. I'm better for living here and knowing you. This place has helped me through a pretty tough time.

Marci... You're giving up a good thing here. But isn't that always the way?

Sunday, March 21, 2004

What RWBS means to me....

Lets see.. What did I gain from being a part of this institution?

-A few new acquaintances
-The chore of keeping the fake pets fed and watered
-I now know my bathroom is cleaner than all of ya'lls
-I have been shown terrible pictures of people/objects that I never knew existed
-And I get to say "Shut up Paul" way more times than I would have if I had never been invited into the house... which makes it all worthwhile.

Thank you :-) You guys are great :-)


I have been the absent house member for way too long. It is like that time I went out for free beer and came back a week later, only this time the details are not as exciting. Don't kick me out I am back.

How My Life Is Enriched By You All:
I have never been dumped on the internet before by someone I don't even know. THANKS A LOT HARD. I would have to meet up with the one other absent posted. I knew I should have gone for jonnie.

I have learned how incredibly bad my spelling is, and often welcome the comments about it.

And I also think it is cool I can get drunk in the hot tub and make an ass of myself and you all treat me like that is normal.

The only way i could be more happy here is if you threw in a few midgets and some elephants. I love you guys... hey, thanks to who ever is feeding free beer. That damn dog would be dead with out you.

Saturday, March 20, 2004

Enrichment... Not just for bread anymore

I've been enriched. Ever since I moved into this looney bin my life has become enriched on so many levels.

I am proud to be a part of this little thing that we got going on here... It is extremely unique in so many ways.

And you guys... my blogmates... are just freaking awesome. Though I am still ignored by most of y'all on the zonker, I feel that I have made several new friends here that I never would have made if not given the opportunity to be here.

I have never met any of you in person, but yet I feel kind of like I know some of you really well... and what you are about. When it comes down to it, we are all about mostly the same things. It usually tinkers on the edge of the strange and bizzare, but I like it that way. We are sharing this strange and bizzare world together.

We are all complete strangers and yet we are all good friends. That in itself has enriched my life.

Whatever it is that we got here is special.

It is working.

It is becoming bigger than life and the envy of the blogosphere.

Thanks to you guys for letting me come on this journey with you. As twisted and strange as it may get in here, it is indeed our Real World. We live it, We love it, and we blog it. And nobody does it better.

I think I have found

the perfect "man" for Marci.


Sniff, sniff, you guys, I mean WOW, you've made it all so real for me, and if that doesn't spell enrichment I don't know what does.

Friday, March 19, 2004

Oh Real World, how do I love thee?

Let me count the ways...
no, seriously--if you'd shut up for a sec, maybe i could focus.
damn you people are noisy.

1. I love drinking in the hot tub, and making out with anyone and everyone who's in there (including the pets..)
2. I have learned how to pee with the door closed....well, sometimes.
3. I have added another log to the "too distracted to be productive" fire, which was only burning at bonfire level before
4. I have formed deep and meaningful friendships with other campers which will last a lifetime. (well, if you count make out sessions as deep friendships..)
5. I love every minute i've spent in this house...has it been 20 or 22?
6. um, that's it. i just wanted to add another number....

also, i bet none of you are driving to Boise idaho singing along to iron maiden and metallica while surfing the web right now. so there. i guess i deserve an award or something. cuz i'm either a complete nerd or a complete metal head or a complete hick...and that's too many people to fit in one body.....

Jonnie On Enrichment

Without digressing into the merits of blogging in general, I think the RWBS possesses numerous additional life enriching characteristics that place it firmly in a class of its own.

Unlike most organizations, the housemates are not necessarily like-minded individuals and where they might ignore one individual’s blog, the mandatory participation insures blah blah blah blah….

HAHAHAHA!!! I was just talking shit. I only joined to meet Belle.

Joining the house has been much like accidentally falling into a swimming pool fully clothed at a public event. Initially embarrassing, and your money’s no good. But also somewhat invigorating and often refreshing, depending on the weather.

The RWBS has enriched my life far more than a job ever could.

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Enriched like fiber.

It's kept me regular.

How the RWBS Has Enriched My Life - by Zannilla Extract

The Real World Blogger Style (RWBS) has improved my life negligibly over the past two months. i have developed close-knit relationships with other bloggers in a window of an entirely different color than the windows in which i had been communicating with them previously. i have experienced the wonder of a virtual hot tub. my friends have been referred to as a "following" (i've never had one of those before!) and now they live here, too. being against the evils of institutions such as sororities and sports teams, i have needed to satisfy my need to belong in other ways. the camaraderie of RWBS has filled that void.

i have learned so much about essential life topics: monkeys, super heroes, webcam scandals, Doc Martens, toasters, sex, BlogMadness, the shaving cream head game, and fake crazy people. you just can't get that anywhere else.

i have been so very happy here that my mind has collapsed into a rubbly pile of writers' blocks, causing me to neglect posting valid content on this AND my personal blog, which has really freed up my time. and, this one time, i got to write a haiku. i have grown as a person, and it's all because of RWBS. thank you. the end. zann out.

Happy two-month anniversary!

Being a member of the RW... blogger style has enriched my sensuality. I hear sweet twitter but there are no birds around. I smell monkeys but there is no zoo. I see sombreros but there is no friggin Mexican.
Well, in fact there were no major changes to my senses of taste and touch, but that maybe because I'm only here for some 5 days or so.

New Assignment

Today is the two month anniversay of The Real World ... Blogger Style.
Your assignment is to write a post telling how being a member of the house has enriched your life.

Thursday, March 18, 2004

Thilly Thursday

so, i was hiding under Belle's bed this morning, and i overheard the strangest thing.
she was on the phone, but i don't know who she was talking to.
she kept mentioning "the squeeze" and something about a garbage bag full of 20's.
i was a little freaked out, but turned on...
so finally she finished the call and then she was humming a strange tune.
something from the rocky horror picture show, i think...
anyway, at the first opportunity, i made like Jesus (and got the flock out of there).
and when i ran into her in the bathroom a few minutes later it was a little awkward.
...and not just because i was in the middle of peeing when she walked in.
we chatted about the weather, but she could tell i was spooked, since i didn't make any lewd comments.
she had a look in her eye, not unlike suspicion.
she couldn't have known i was listening to her shady conversation, but i'm a little worried anyway.

so if Belle asks anyone what happened to the stash of porn she had squirrelled away under her bed...
don't tell her it was me!


So if you all could stop yelling at each other all night, I'd appreciate it.

PS - That isn't me in the's my lady friend.

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Wednesday, March 17, 2004

Just kill me

Pose for me baby, pose

I found this "Sexual Preference Generator"

while surfing the net last night, and here are the results that I came up with for the members of the house.

What is your sexual preference?

1. Marci - 22 year old Brazilian midgets.
2. Zann - Plushies and over age rock stars.
3. Hard Artist - Exhibitionism, well, duh!!!
4. Belle - The Monica Lewinsky syndrome.
5. Dvl - Spank me Daddy, I've been a naughty girl.
6. Mike - Josie and the Pussycats meets the gang from Scooby Doo.
7. Goose - Barnyard animals. I think that explains how he got the nickname.
8. Jonnie - Dark skinned gentlemen from Cameroon.
9. Zoot - Sax sex.
10. Bored Housewife - I'm sorry Bobby, I can't find my purse so I guess I'm going to have to find another way to pay you for mowing the lawn.
11. Sandra - Mistress, your next appointment is here.

My computer crashed and I lost the link before I was able to find out about me.
Funny how that stuff works out, isn't it.

What is the weirdest thing

that you have in your refrigerator right now?
I just checked.
I have a can of spam in mine, but I have no idea how it got there.

You want to know what annoys me about Belle?

It's the way she laughs.
She always goes ahahahahaha.
What's with the a?
There is no a before hahahahahaha.
No wonder I can't sleep at night.

Tuesday, March 16, 2004

Here ya go Goose:

I'll E-Mail it off to 'ya if you like it.

We have a new member in the house.

His name is Mike, but he goes by the name of The Hard Artist.
Welcome to the house HA. I hope he doesn't mind that I call him HA, anything over five letters kicks my ass.

I've been a little lax in my posting lately...

How's that? Goose, if you're listening... I'm working on your picture today! Jeez... I look weird. Stupid camera phone...

Oh... And I'm:

You're Great Expectations!

by Charles Dickens

Coming from humble beginnings, you have become pretty stuck-up in your
later years. While hard work and dedication were the path you first walked on, a sudden
fork brought you glory and fortune. Unfortunately, you have changed even more than your
bottom line. You really should turn back to your old friends and at least respect your
old life. Look out for haughty hotties.

Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

i'm one hoopy frood who really knows where her towel is

i swear, i didn't cheat or otherwise influence this quiz to mark me as my all-time favorite book. it's just that clever... Deep Thought must have programmed it.

You're The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy!

by Douglas Adams

Considered by many to be one of the funniest people around, you are
quite an entertainer. You've also traveled to the far reaches of what you deem possible,
often confused and unsure of yourself. Life continues to jostle you around like a marble,
but it's shown you so much of the world that you don't care. Wacky adventures continue to
lie ahead. Your favorite number is 42.

Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

and just for kicks, here's a h2g2 link:
Vogon Poetry Generator

I'm So Deep You Could Drown In Me

You're Watership Down!

by Richard Adams

Though many think of you as a bit young, even childish, you're
actually incredibly deep and complex. You show people the need to rethink their
assumptions, and confront them on everything from how they think to where they
build their houses. You might be one of the greatest people of all time. You'd
be recognized as such if you weren't always talking about talking rabbits.

Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

Monday, March 15, 2004

Initiation ritual, part II

As I tend to see myself in the tradition of the early 20th century Dadaism-artists, my intention is to negate all common aesthetical and social values with the following haiku:

Black Bettie Death Cult
La La La La La La La
Black Bettie Death Cult

I know that - apart from the number of syllables - this has about NOTHING to do with a traditional haiku, but I aimed to shock.

I'm a rebel at heart.


self portrait has been added to the gallery.
I have also been informed that she loves her South Park icon, but ....
And there's always a but, isn't there,
She wants bangs like zoot has.
Oh yeah, she wants big boobs too, but then again don't we all.
I have a feeling that Sandra might be a little bit of trouble, and not just because of her "Dirndl With A Whip" self-portrait.

satellite wafers

Satellite Wafers: 240CT Box
just in time for them to be discontinued... but i thought you guys might remember these. i pretended the candy things inside were evil aliens, and i was doing my duty to the Federation by eating them. sistah rocks for bringing the Candy Warehouse site to my attention this morning.

Thanks a lot zoot

because of you I had nightmares about potato chips all night, and I hope you never know just how scary that really is.

Sunday, March 14, 2004

kiss my blarney stone.

as St. Patrick's Day draws near, i am getting more excited about making my Irish brownies. here's some links for you all:

St. Patrick's Day Quiz
fun factoids
why to beware the Ides of March

the St. Patrick
drink ideas
Bailey's all the way

March 14th is Potato Chip day!

What's your favorite chip?

Sandra's initiation into the house

1. She must write a haiku about herself. (5 syllables, 7 syllables, 5 syllables)
2. She must create a self portrait of herself for our self portrait gallery.

She can post her haiku, and send me her self portrait and I will post that.

Oh yeah, for extra credit she can drink the blood of a virgin.
We usually use Jonnie for virgin blood drinking.


Oh, there are so many people with pets in this house..... anyone mind if I bring my cat too? Her name is "Tiny". She likes to hang around in bed and she has lost her interest in everything save food. She's SO like me!

Inspirational Poster

I'm gonna hang this up in the living room.

Kind of heartwarming, huh?

I don't foresee any house issues as long as we have this to refer to.


Saturday, March 13, 2004

How well do you know your fellow housemates?

Take the Quiz!

And find out.

Another extremely accurate quiz

Yes, it's true.

*looks at the current world's population* You must have a lot of frustration then.

What pisses you off?

Created by ptocheia

If you're stupid and reading this, never mind. Stupid people cant read...

Germans do it better

After weeks of hiding in the bushes in front of your house ( I have 2 stalking-charges going on now, are you satisfied?!) and watching you from afar, Boz has finally decided to show a little compassion and let me in. YAY!

Though I'm not quite sure yet if Boz let me in because he likes me or because he couldn't stand Jonnie's begging any more... . But now that I got a foot in the door, you won't get rid of me easily... mwahaha!

So, what shall I say... I'm german, currently living in Hamburg, 25 years old and well, check my blog, there's a little about me-section too. Feel free to make jokes about all my spelling- and grammar-mistakes and also feel free to ask me everything you ever wanted to know about Sauerkraut.

What else? I got a diploma in economics and a job in marketing but as this isn't satisfying at all, I'm currently busy establishing a cult with me as the deified leader.

That's basically it. So will somebody show me where the bathroom is? I brought my special toothbrush, just in case I'll get a little homesick.

(mwahaha, let's see how long it takes untill they realize that I infiltrated this house for disciple-recruiting and brainwashing purposes only... MWAHAHA... ooops, did I just say that loud?!?!)

Amazing how these are so accurate!

*looks at the current world's population* You must have a lot of frustration then.

What pisses you off?

Created by ptocheia

not true. i love them.

my first result was stupid people, but i didn't want to copy dvl (because being just like dvl is my secret quest, and posting identical quizzes would expose my plans).

You must be pretty peeved right now then, eh?

What pisses you off?

Created by ptocheia

well, at least the quiz is accurate...

because my results are certainly not news to anyone who knows me.

Another stupid quiz I just stumbled across

Especially the ones that go off right after you've sat down, and spray your ass. Dont'cha just hate that?

What pisses you off?

Created by ptocheia

They grow up so fast ...

and many happy returns.

Dear Goose,

Your pic is coming. I'm a little indisposed right now, X gonna give it to 'ya!

Zoot, how could you???

I mean big deal, so his drumming drowned out your sax.
He was a friggin' icon for crying out loud.

Ringo Starr

Disclaimer: Ringo isn't really dead, it's a joke, ok, a joke!!!

Friday, March 12, 2004

Pictures for Friday night

Stairway to Gilligan

Try it... You will probably hate it. Click here.

It's almost as good as the Butthole Surfers' Hairway to Steven.

The Dead Parrot

"'E's not pinin'! 'E's passed on! This parrot is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is maker! 'E's a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed 'im to the perch 'e'd be pushing up the daisies! 'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile!!He's fuckin' snuffed it!..... THIS IS AN EX-PARROT!"

Thursday, March 11, 2004

random links of fun stuff for you to click

More horns for you to purchase
Eat Schitt and Die
Just can't fix

It's only 1138pm? Gosh, isn't it the weekend yet? Sigh.

What gives???

Zoot is queasy, belle thinks she might die, and I've got a headache that could sink the Titanic, and ...

Wednesday, March 10, 2004

I found this man:

In my bathroom today. He must have taken up residence there after my swingin' party Sat. Night.

Can you guess this F-list celebrities name? You're super-cool if you can.

That was stupid, I know. I just felt like I've been neglecting the housemates... That's all. I miss you guys. Has Marci started fooling around in my absence?

Photo Albums

If you scan down the right hand side of the page you'll notice that I have posted buzznet photo albums of both Dvl and myself. If anyone else is interested just go sign up at buzznet, and let me know about it, and I will post your album.
Only the last five pictures you post would be linked here.

This Is Not My Bathroom

But I might wish it was.

The only toilet pic you'll get from me...

This picture was taken when the child at hand was busted stuffing an entire box of Talcum Powder down the hole in the toilet... She is in fact, standing on the box in this picture. Grandfather had to take his toilet apart to remove said box. Man was he mad.

Tuesday, March 09, 2004


Is this really an Iowa toilet?

My nothing but sharp things

Tupperware storage compartment drawer.

potty blogging from work...

Here's Mine

Note the ergonomic toilet plunger handle.

Complete with 2 sinks and a coffeemaker -
(I also snuck in my devil horns pic too - 2 for 1).

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What the hell ...

Too bad you can't see the ceiling that is about to collapse and the faucet that I broke that requires a plumber to fix.

since we're posting toilet pictures...

here's the construction site known as my downstairs bathroom...

for the record, flushing toys down one of these bad boys is not a good idea.

Don't sh*t where you post

Odd Bathrooms - Part 2

My friend Gina had an interesting bathroom accessory -
kitchen sink sprayer attached directly to the toilet -

Kind of a built-in cleaning tool / personal hygeine product, I guess.

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as if you want to see another bathroom

i took my potty picture yesterday while i was out and about. notice that this bathroom is handicap-friendly, which means it is regular-people-unfriendly. my feet do not reach the floor, and my arms can barely reach the toilet paper from the sitting position. haha, funny, right?

at least it's not that filthy. i've seen *much* worse.

Dvl and I doing the webcam thing