The Real World ... Blogger Style: 11/01/2004 - 12/01/2004

Tuesday, November 30, 2004

Now for a message from our sponsors

Reading Pisser today got me started thinking about commercials. What tv commercials do you love? Hate?

I love
Cadillac
Mitsubishi (have a CD of Mitsubishi commercial music)
Dog food/cat food (as long as cartoons are not involved)
The Net Zero take offs of AOL commercials (watch for them - you can't tell the difference if you don't listen carefully)

I hate
Old Navy. Really. Hate.
That grinning guy on the erectile dysfunction medicine commercial ("he is made of wood; he will not bend") (It's a failed campaign if I don't remember the name of the medication)
Any commercial that says "Ask your doctor about [fill in the name of the medication]" and doesn't even tell you what the medication is for. Yeah, like I am going to go running to my doctor and pay $90 to find out what a medication is for! "Why, doctor...what do you mean I don't need Cialis?"

Getting better:
Target

It's good to see that the classics never go out of style

We used to do the same thing to a guy called Ollie whenever he was dumb enough to get drunk and fall asleep when I was in the air force and stationed in Japan 30 years ago. We called it Making Ollie A Billboard.



I think it was because Ollie was the only college graduate among us and it was the only we way we had of sticking it to what we perceived as the intellectual elite.

Monday, November 29, 2004

This just in ...

Dear Mr Cole,

Please be aware that Miss Olo-Pay* has melted and died at school today due
to the extreme heat. Her attempts at staying cool by eating multiple
icy poles at once failed.
Please send flowers to her home address
(star gazer lillies were her favourite *sob*)
Rest in Peace, she will be missed

From someone who isnt' Rosa



*Edited by request.

WTF?

Reason number 237 why Target is better than Walmart. See this article.

The Irish Liberace

The highlight of my Thanksgiving was watching the Daniel O'Donnell PBS telethon live from Branson Missouri! For those of you unfamiliar with this phenomenon, D.O.D. is kind of like the Irish Liberace. He sings --nay, croons to hordes of little old ladies, flirting like a shameless gigolo and reminding them of their careless, pre-WWII youth. Their hearts fibrillate. At first I thought, 'what a whore' but then, as I watched my grandma smiling on the couch with roses in her cheeks (it might have been the cocktails) I thought, ok, in a way, he's kind of a saint, providing sensations of romance (and dare I say, ecstasy) for hundreds of thousands of grandmas who might otherwise go unfulfilled. So, if you know a "senior" lady who is feeling a bit low, just pop in a Daniel O'Donnell cd, dvd or cassette, and he will croon her back to girlhood and make her feel sweet sixteen. Cheers to the Irish Liberace, who has no real talent other than the ability to mince around onstage and make the old feel young again.

This message has been sponsored by your local public television network.

Sunday, November 28, 2004

Christmas in Australia

i have bloody mosquito bites all over my feet (including on my heel!!!) and arms... oh its almost christmas time (mozzie season) funny i havnt seen any christmas beetles yet... ahh the dive bombing by the little creatures.. memories of childhood. Tomorow the mercury will hit 42 degrees (centigrade suckers!) so am thinking of coming to work in my swimmers.

Friday, November 26, 2004

Dinner pretty much tanked it

How bad is it when the turkey is the best part of the thanksgiving dinner?
Everything else tasted watery. I guess that comes from eating at a buffet where everything is on a steam table, and some things are on a steam table longer than others, but wait ...
The pumpkin pie was watery too, and that was even before I left my footprints in it.

Wednesday, November 24, 2004

WANK!

I just finished doing my personal statements for writing fellowships and I feel like a major WANK. I am going to Santa Cruz with my mom(here from Japan) for the break but will be back sunday or monday, I hope to god, unless I die from filial piety.
WANK!
I am a bit hyper. I feel like my dog after he took a major dump. He'd be so happy to be free of it he'd race around in figure eights like a demented thing. I am so relieved to have crapped out those wanky essays.
WANK!
Here's an excerpt:
"Tangential to this, I have been working on narrative poems that spring from an obsession with figures from American mythology—real people that have crystallized into symbols. Small moments outside of (exiled from?) biography’s traditional writ interest me. My work also explores the relationship between power, image, language, art, and memory. "
WANK WANK WANK!
Happy Thanksgiving, don't get dyspepsia and try to avoid dystopia, as well. And don't let Boz get footprints in the punkin pie.
Love,
AmyJo

Happy Turkey Day

Everyone who is travelling, be careful. Everyone who is staying home, be careful. And remember---you can't kill your family members. It is still illegal.



See you next week.

as published on WTWSD

HOORAY FOR.....
1. Bumping into Mr "10" (see post below) at the end of the day and having funny and meaningless banter for a few minutes (he wants to transfer to my staffroom) Totally making a uber crappy day better.
2. Gmail - i have made the switch, ive left my 4 year old yahoo account and jumped ship.
3. Friends - with invites out to do fun stuff.
4. A (kinda) day off tomorow!
5. oooh lots of stuff..... hooray for you!

Tuesday, November 23, 2004

Our Buzznet Account

Our buzznet account (see sidebar - House Photo Album) has sat inactive for a long time. So I took it upon myself to start posting again.
We have one of the older free accounts so we are entitled to 200 pictures a month. Let's use it. You can post whatever you want. If you need our account information just email me at boz48730 at gmail dot com.

I'm just sayin....

...things would be pretty different in my life if my bid on the Virgin Mary grilled cheese sandwich hadn't been sniped at the last minute. That's all I'm sayin'.

Ask

and you shall receive.

It's time for another installment of ...

Caption this pic.


Monday, November 22, 2004

SVGPSA

While I was trying to figure out how SVG worked for an assignment, I ended up generating this hodge podge of crap.

I don't like to waste things, even if they are useless; so I am posting it here (as opposed to posting it on Nacho).

It actually would make a pretty decent sign in our virtual front yard.

We need to have some sort of competition or something

You know, choose up sides and play rugby, or lawn darts, or Trivial Pursuit, or strip Monopoly.
I mean I've got all this pent up aggression and if I don't bitch slap someone pretty damn quick I might have to run up into the stands and ...
Oh shit, it's 1:30 in the morning, I'm going to bed.
Yeah, strip Monopoly, I never lose at Monopoly.

Friday, November 19, 2004

Holiday decor

1. Do you decorate for the holidays?
2. If so, to what extent?
3. When do you put up decorations?
4. If a Christmas tree, real or fake?
5. What are you going to buy Nancy for Christmas?

Thursday, November 18, 2004

Amyjo has a new icon

It makes her look more Holly Golightly-ish and less Sylvia Plath-ish, don't you think?

Amy Golightly



SylviaJo

I'm not afraid of Virginia Wolf

This quiz was actually way to heavy for me.
It's probably more Amyjo's cupper of tea.

orlando
Virginia Woolf: Orlando. You are a challenge, for
outer events, the outside world, the time etc.
play no importance to you. Your focus is in
writing, in gender issues, and inside your own
head. Self-analysis and exploration of yourself
as well as the outer world hold great
importance to you.


Which literature classic are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Hey, Disney World is in Orlando!!!
I'm there!!!

Which Literary Classic Am I?

Found over at Kat's place -

1984
George Orwell: Nineteen Eighty-Four.
You are the
classic warning against the threat of
totalitarianism.
To you, politics and
philosophy are inseparable, auchtorities suck
and the reality might not exist outside our
imaginations.

Which literature classic are you?

New friend of rw...bs linkage

I've added Coty & Joel to our friends link.
I think Coty is female and Joel is male, but I'm not positive, and does it matter, I mean really, does it?
It looks like they are into that whole pagan scene, which is cool, and if you look at our group header pic I think we could pass for a coven or at least something out of Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

official quiz results

Excluding marci and mad because they didn't take the quiz the official results are ...
-youngest to oldest-
Rosa, Sandra, Belle, Amyjo, Jonnie, Dvl, Nancy, and Boz.

And depending on what age scale you use CJ would either be the youngest, somewhere in the middle, or the oldest.

Sandra's Christmas wishlist

I know I'm a little bit early to utter wishes but since my desired object is currently listed on ebay.com I wanted to make sure nobody misses the auction.


Virgin Mary appeared on grilled cheese sandwich

You can find the item here.

Bid till it hurts.

Wednesday, November 17, 2004

I forgot to post belle's answers

Belle's answers
1. rosa
2. marci
3. me
4. mad
5. sandra
6. amyjo
7. jonnie
8. dvl
9. nancy
10. t-dub

Quiz results

Since not everyone took the quiz and since Jonnie and belle forgot to give their ages I had no idea what the actual results are, but I find it much more interesting finding out how old we thing the others in the house are, of course if I hadn't told everyone I was the oldest I'd probably be listed in the younger third of the room.
The Results ...

Boz - Youngest to oldest, Rosa, Sandra, Mad, Belle, Marci, Amyjo, Jonnie, Dvl, Nancy, Boz 54.
Dvl - Youngest to oldest, rosa, belle, marci, mad, amyjo, sandra, jonnie, dvl 35, nancy, boz.
Sandra - Rosa, Marci, Sandra 26, Mad, Belle, Jonnie, Dvl, Amyjo, Nancy, Boz.
Jonnie - Rosa, Sandra, Belle, Marci, Mad, Amyjo, Jonnie, Dvl, Nancy, Boz.
Nancy - Jonnie, Marci, Belle, Sandra, Rosa, Amyjo, Mad, Dvl, Nancy 51, Boz.
Rosa - CJ(in human years), amyjo, rosa 23, jonnie, sandra, mad, dvl, marci, belle, nancy, boz.
Amyjo - AmyJo is younger than Jonnie, Boz, Nancy and possibly DVL but older than Sandra, Rosa, Mad, Belle and Marci. As for CJ, are we talking dog years or human years? I am probably older than CJ in either case.
AmyJo is 29.
As for the kids younger than me, they all are probably in the same age
range, mid to late 20s? But haven't hit the summit of 30.
In emotional years, frankly I feel like the group curmudgeon.
I want to know people's zodiac signs and shoe sizes.

Leave it to Amyjo to make a Master's Theses out of it.

No results from Marci or Mad.

Quiz update

I will be posting the quiz results tonight. Just the results, not the answers, because not everyone took the quiz or at least sent me their ages. So if you didn't
you can go stick a needle in your eye and go sit in the corner and bleed to death for all I care.
Because the chosen ones and I will be laughing and carrying on at all the funny answers ... and stuff.
You still have time to be one of the chosen ones, but don't delay.
The needles are due back from the needle sharpener's any time now!!!

Mrs. Dewey & the Jello


What could Mrs. Dewey have possibly done with the jello?
The ad seems to suggest she put it in her shirt.

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Tuesday, November 16, 2004

Get a Hint stick

Lately my thoughts have turned lightly to violence.
I fantasize about wielding a baseball bat.

City life is making me aggro. I told my first homeless person to Fuck off! a few days ago. He was barking at me like a dog as I went back and forth between galleries. Finally, I just lost it. I screamed it so spontaneously and naturally, I surprised myself. I can feel myself changing... the city works like a potion, transforming me into a BITCH.

In High School I had a two by four on which I'd crayoned the motto "get a hint!!!". It was for whapping adorable sk8r boys who didn't realize I was willing to sleep with them.
I never used it, I just flourished it around the halls. I wonder what became of it.

I'd love to have my dear Get a Hint Stick now, only I'd use it to make war, not love. I'd use it to bean bus drivers who arrive late, to take out street corner hecklers, to beat the living shit out of my computer, and to pole vault over the mysterious and ill-fragrant puddles that dot the Mission district.

Monday, November 15, 2004

Quiz update

We are still waiting for the quiz answers from Marci, Belle, Mad, Amyjo and Rosa. Somehow it doesn't surprise me that these are the five.
BTW ... where the fook is Mad anyway???

Whoa!

Look at all the posting that has been going on! What a flurry of activity. Gotta love it. I take a weekend off and come back to find the entire complexion of the page has changed.

But now I feel that I must contribute, and I really have nothing much to say. Not even a good CrankyMom story. She has been behaving beautifully lately.

I feel so inadequate.

Hey, any of you SoCal RW...BS peeps need a couch? For free? I have an extra one that needs to go bye bye....Also a coffee table and a CD rack. And I don't know what else. Furniture rearranging in my house --> too much furniture. Leave me a comment here if you are interested, or email me at nanntz at gmail dot com
The second best blog on the internet
The second best blog on the internet
photo by: boz48730

Sunday, November 14, 2004

Big Melons

WOW!


Look at this big freaking melon!!
It barely fits in my shopping cart!!!

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Saturday, November 13, 2004

Quiz, quiz, quiz, quiz, quiz

The weeks quiz.
List the house members from youngest to oldest.
I'll give you a hint.
1. ?
2. ?
3. ?
4. ?
5. ?
6. ?
7. ?
8. ?
9. ?
10. Boz

Send your answers and your AGE to boz48730 at gmail dot com.

The Beautiful People


look at the header of the page.. we are an extrodinarily good looking bunch of people arent we! We are obviously the creme of the race.. thats what i think anyway.

I think this low fat low GI thing i have been sticking to for a whole 2 weeks now (feels like 2 years) is getting to me. For two weeks i have avoided all the food groups that i love (candies - carbs, chocolate - dairy, chips, fries, snacks etc - vegetables, delicious hot white fluffy bread.. mmmm bread plus i dont eat meat remember) and have excercised more so than usual and then yesterday i walk into a shop run by supermodels who happen to be at the counter eating McDonalds and a greasy kebab and get sneered at when i ask if they have a particular top in large. Its pretty crap, dont get me wrong i didnt think it was going to fall off, or that i would see instant results. its just insulting when you have been trying so hard and then you see a "perfect" sitting on her ass eating junk (i havnt eaten Mcdonalds, KFC, Taco Bell etc for years, 6 years infact since i gave up meat). When are people going to fucking grow up?

I think we are a gorgeous bunch of people. (and dog)

Now im going downstairs to eat a whole grain rye bread salad sandwich. (the troll thinks my black rye bread looks like charcoal)

Sandra and Dvl at play

Two bored girls on a Saturday afternoon.

Dear housemates! (Boz!)

I woke up with a big bruise on my right forearm this morning and I have no idea what or who (Boz?) could've caused it.



So I came to the conclusion that someone (Boz?) must have hit me while I was asleep. I don't want to judge too hastily, but it must have been someone from this house (Boz?). I have no idea who it was, though (Boz?). I'm completely neutral.

Don't worry, I won't punish you (Boz), I just want to know what's going on while I'm asleep. I mean, if there's some naked pillow-fighting or SM-orgy going on at night, for christ's sake wake me up before you involve me!!!

So, anyone wants to admit the wrongdoing (Boz?)? Or any eyewitnesses?

Friday, November 12, 2004

Lights, camera, action !!!

Let's Look At This Instead

Your assignment for the weekend

Caption this pic.



I found it on bandfag.com.

meh

At the beginning of the year i was targetted for a teaching position in a small country town 7 hours out of sydney. i turned down the job, today after a horrendous week with the turds i came home and logged on and coincidentally found a link to that school. this is pretty much the first time i have regretted turning down the job.. i mean with a true blue aussie page like that i was sure to fit in at the school. (wait for the sound to start up boz.. you'll love it!)

Griffith High School

Thursday, November 11, 2004

All I want for Christmas ....

...is this.

No post for two days.

Time for a post. Gotta post. Posting now.

Tuesday, November 09, 2004

posting

When I was twelve I learned to horseback ride in Australia. One of the first things they teach you is how to 'post' in the saddle. (I don't think posting is an American riding term. I think its British. ) Anyway, posting is something you do when a horse it trotting. You were supposed to thrust your pelvis up from the stirrups and let your ass fall back in the saddle with the horse's rhythm. This is so you don't bounce. So now when I think of posting, I think of the weird psychosexual dynamics of girls and horses. And also of the fact that horses fart in perfect time when they trot. Tallyho!

Words

My thoughts on a CNN.com headline

"Residents: School strafing 'unacceptable'" You think? Really? Just because the national guard flies over and shoots the hell out of a local elementary school, you are playing the "uacceptable" card? Harsh. That totally harshed my mellow.


You are cordially invited....

to do a guest post at my blog... any takers? please email me.
*whine*
so am seriously having a burn out week. Arrived at work today at 7 and wont leave til at least 5 (doesnt sound so bad but after a day on your feet, yelling at nauseating children.. you are shit tired) yesterday was the same. stayed at school until 5.30 (when the cleaners close the gates) then went straight to a cafe for dinner with a colleage. then got home and wrote a number of exam papers for 7tard and others. Only one car was in the carpark when i arrived, i have had an hour and ahalf to photocopy exam papers and get started on lesson prep and report writing (as in report cards) but what am i doing? blogging... naturally!
*end whine*

You love me, you really love me

If I knew it was going to be this easy I would have asked for money, or sex, or a new car, or sex, or a heart transplant, or sex, or cheese ... yeah cheese!!!!

nous sommes amies, ouais?


Northern lights

Some great northern lights shots taken in Nebraska, of all places!

Consumer report

Re: Dr. Scholl's gel soles (I'm gellin' like a felon)

Not so much. Not worth the six or eight bucks I spent on them. Just thought you should know.

I'm here, Bozworth....

The thought for the day from "Today I Will Nourish My Inner Martyr":

"It is my inalienable right to wreak havoc in the lives of people I know."

It's the same with me, Rosa

When Boz says "Post!" I say "How long?".

I'm so busy these days with this Business English Certificate thingy I'm trying to get and I'm also busy with researching on immigration issues (because one day, Jonnie and me want to be able to be together for more than 90 days a year).

Oh, speaking of immigration issues... somewhere in the middle of the visa process I'll have to have an interview with the American consul in Frankfurt/ Germany. He'll also hand me a form where I'll have to write my name, adress and all that crap on. One of the questions asked on that form is:

Are you a member of a terrorist organization? Yes_ No_

Damn right, why spend millions on research and complex biometric data analysis when you can simply ask?!?!

I'm not sure yet what I'll answer... I mean, I'm a catholic.

you called and i have answered

because i am a wonderful person. You know i am run off my feet and feel kinda fluey but instead of lying on my warm, soft cushioney bed... oh the warmth, i am here... almost dead on my feet but here none the less... why? because of this man. bless his heart


we heart boz

Don't make me post more pictures of myself, because I will!

Somebody
Somewhere
Make a post.

Sunday, November 07, 2004

Seriously, I was cute

Boz Brummel
Boz Brummel
photo by: boz48730

Looking ever so dapper in his blazer and fedora.

Saturday, November 06, 2004

Nagasaki, Saturday Night

The lost Nagasaki photos, Spring 1972
The lost Nagasaki photos, Spring 1972
photo by: boz48730

Drinking


Click the pic to see the rest of my Nagasaki Odyssey. All six pics.

Friday, November 05, 2004

Thought for the day

Here is your thought for the day from "Today I Will Nourish My Inner Martyr":

"I delight in my ability to pout and sulk."

head cleaners

Anyone have a sure fire method to dislodge annoying songs going round and round on repeat in one's head? It's worse than having the hiccups.

When I lived in the zen monastery I used to get "Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend" stuck in my head anytime I sat down on the zafu to meditate. (I wonder if that was my inner starlet telling me I was in the wrong place.) Anyway, it was maddening. At least I knew all the words to it, though.
But in modern songs the singers all have mushmouth so it sounds more like this: blah blah something something famous for showing her chest blah blah her pants around her ankles blah blah and I have been sleeping badly blah blah blah it was the best sex she ever had...

It's making me nuts.
Apart from taking a bullet, how do I fire my evil ocd internal disc jockey?

Thursday, November 04, 2004

This is the 1,000th post on RW ... BS

And I think it is only fitting that I make it.
To tell you the truth I thought this thing would last about eight weeks and then we'd shit can it.
So huzzah to all of us present rw...bs'ers and to all the former bs'ers who have passed through these hallowed walls.
Huzzah, huzzah, huzzah!!!

Wednesday, November 03, 2004

BOZ?

apparently boz is a whole lot more worldly that he first let on.

check it out here.

a wha?

humbug humbug

I've coined a new word in honor of the unchanged regime: Fucko. It's a combination of psycho and fuckhead and it describes the grinning rubber-eared monkey skull running our country.
I am going to have to seek asylum.

In other news, the Day of the Dead parade in the Mission district in SF was a thing of beauty. People with skulls painted over their skins over their skulls took to the streets with lit candles, carrying burning sage torches. There were people in rose head-dresses and corsets, people playing drums and pulling huge float-waggons decked in cobwebs and bunting, a dog in a tutu with a light-up skull around its neck, gorgeous women of every description, feathers, bones, I Voted stickers and kids in velvet wrestlers capes. There were children in strollers pushed by soccer moms wearing black J Crew sweaters and homeless people with running sores and beautiful men on stilts and gothic schoolmarms all walking in procession to a little park crowded with altars for the dead. And it was all solemn and ecstatic at the same time. Sometimes in a crowd like that I just want to kiss everybody. People can be so generous and lovely when they're playing with one another. I still have the smell of sage in my hair.

My favorite slogan: Santa Muerte--Death is for everyone.

Tuesday, November 02, 2004

If ...

If you could pick anyone you wanted to be the next president, or prime minister, or chancellor, who would you pick?
My choice would be Donald Kilbuck.

Monday, November 01, 2004

Nov. 1

Happy rabbit rabbit day.