Juan Bodley, RW...BS Meterologist!

I heard last week that the recent hurricane was named "Beryl," so natch I heard in my head "Hurricane Boz." No offense, Boz, I just do that. So after that I came up with this...
Please welcome the Official 2006 Real World...Blogger Style Hurricane Forecast. In no particular order.

Hurricane Boz: slow moving, a real pain in the neck storm. Originating over Lake Michigan, it gets it's backlash from overseas currents and ideas from 70's miscast TV shows. Also driven by Internet scams and rage against Sam Walton's Evil Empire.
Hurricane Malone: in a tropical depression, he gathers force with deep thinking and Thai food. (I think; he's always off the radar...) Jedi, maybe(??!!??)
Hurricane AmyJo: lost in the weeds, a total rash on the Doppler Super 69 Mega-Master Storm Center. You never know where she's been or what she's packing (or scratching...) A giant vortex over the next available nunnery...
Hurricane RLB: how do you predict lightning in a bottle?? Jonnie back-builds in the nearest research facility, and with a Hulk-hands assisted punch, POW!! Right in the kisser, tacos and all...
Hurricane Sandra: say Guten tag to the dark force. In a lederhosen rage she sneaks up and slams the left coast (nearest landfall is usually near dead cars in the streets of the O.C., or the nearest wiener dog race.) Eager to get hitched to another storm, so watch out for this one!!
Typhoon Belle: Belle is your classic "stalking" type storm...late at night while Benson is on she cleans out your basement and takes Jon-Benet with her, leaving Kirk Cameron to empty the fridge and prophesize on your TV.
Hurricane Marci: We here in the RW...BS Forecast Center have only been able to isolate this storm over eastern Atlanta, maybe near Buckhead, in a staggering pattern. You would think she'd be wheeling away but it's usually staggering. Don't really have an explanation why...
Typhoon Rosa Posa: let's all learn something from this storm, shall we? A classy storm, she only makes landfall on the high-dollar neighborhoods, or wherever there's "shrimp on the barby"...or a midget on some chick named Barbie, and the Foster's got exported for the Yanks. AussieAussieAussie!!!
Hurricane DVL: unseen on the radar, this storm would be more of a "subversive" class disturbance...our spotters in the field have not located her...and radar is clean at the moment.
Hurricane Juan Bodley: keep an eye out for this one...he'll talk ya into submission and take your Pepsi, leaving the Coke behind. Ladies, better keep your pants on when this one lands nearby!! Always a screw (or two) loose in this chaotic mess of stormy clutter...he'll trash a Sears hardware department in seconds and then level Home Depot, Best Buy, and Kroger's meat section in that order. Fueled by Jaymz Hetfield's music and bloodlust...

There ya have it, ladies and grunts!! Best to update your storm insurance and batton down the hatches. Send your complaints to the general manager, c/o RW...BS, the weather dept., attention: crackpot weather.
(remember these are "forecasts" and not attacks against any person, except maybe Belle...she needs a man, I think...)