hard?

Contrary to popular belief Hard is really an 80 year old german woman living in a small grasshut in eastern Kentucky. Also known as "das purpurrote eichhörnchen" he/she/it has been known to menace trailer parks while leaping naked from tree to tree. In recent months das purpurrote eichhörnchen, scourge of the trailer park trash, has been sighted gingerly plucking the feather's from pigeon's bottoms and using them to fashion the soon to be patented "pigeon butt feather exosuit." The details of this suit are still unknown but it is said to revolutionize human life as we know it.

In closing the naked DPE, bane of the TPT, is creating the PBFE to save humanity.