Rollergirls: A Review

Rollergirls is a show about girls who roller skate. As far as I can tell the concept and rules of the game can only be explained using salt shakers, but I did learn that there are "blockers" and there are "jammers." Apparently the "jammers" skate around and break through the "blockers" who are, get this, blocking their way. Once they break through and skate around the track one time, the pushing and beating and kicking and doing whatever it takes to get in the lead begins. I think it is some sort of a race, but don't quote me on that.
Tonight's episode featured rookie "Venis Envy,"
who started crying at her first scrimmage after she inverted this "Lux" girl's nipples,

and "Cha Cha,"
who pees in alleys and just might actually be a man, even though she drops her daughter JON BENET RAMSEY off at strangers' houses so she can go do the aforementioned peeing in alleys.
Needless to say, Lux got her nipples un-inverted and won the game.
And the moral of the story is never invite your mother to a Rollergirls game, especially if your mother is Hilary Clinton's twin sister and you are going to have your ass hanging out all night.