Oh, And, Det Ligger En Smurf Begravd I Mitt Smor

There is just No Way I'm surviving this month. I just saw a commercial featuring the muppets and...Jessica Goddamn Simpson, there are no Hallmark Blushing Bears on my doorstep, I just found out I may have been confusing Martin Sheen with Michael Douglas all this time, my dad is in the hospital, and I dropped my cell phone in a pitcher of margaritas (for the second time).
I give up. February, you win.