Can someone give me a hand?

i don't travel light...so get your lazy pruned-from-too-much-hot-tubbing asses out here and help me haul in my shit. That's right. Your worst nightmares have been realized...the house has added yet another member and i'm a real bitch to live with. I snore, I sleep late, I cuss like a sailor and pee with the door open. I flirt with all the boys and, lately, pretty much all of the girls, too. so watch out.

either that, or this will be my first and last post...cuz i'm also a little flakey (okay, maybe a lot, but who asked you?)
but can i just say: i freaking love blogger for making this so easy! i just get to log in once and choose a blog. you're going to be sorry...cuz my motto is: if it's easy i do it (also if he/she is easy i do him/her...)
whatever.
bring me some vanilla cappucino.
and if my husband calls--i'm not here!!

Edit
If Lisa's husband calls, I'm not here either - boz