The Real World ... Blogger Style: Saddest words of tongue or pen II

Thursday, January 13, 2005

Saddest words of tongue or pen II

Then I had a long dry spell. From third grade until tenth grade, no one begged me for my hand until...
Suitor #2
I can never decide if he was a sociopath or just a typical 17 year old guy. I associate him with freezing cold. He was a demon made of snow.
He was my first. There was no blood and so he accused me of having done all sorts of things I'd never heard of. It hurt a lot. At the time I was very religious (my catholic phase) and I wouldn't hear of having sex before marriage, even though I was desperately in love with him. The feeling was not mutual. (but like many dumb adolescents, I believed that sex created love) I held out for so long he asked me to marry him. I was curious. He was beautiful. It was a total con. We were lovers for about 4 months, until he dumped me for my best friend, right before prom who screwed him within the week and dumped him at the dance.

The manner of the proposal:
In the Citadel (the old walled city) in Ankara. A heavy snow had fallen. We climbed over the ramparts of the old castle and skidded into this little knoll below the floodlights. Below that was a sheer drop, trash at the bottom of the mountain, and all the city in the distance. Minarets in the snow. He told me we'd live in a castle. My feet were freezing. We were missing another girl's birthday party, a girl who was also in love with him. He never kissed me, not once. (because I had braces, he said). We had to remain a secret. I never told anyone anything about any of this for nearly five years.