The Real World ... Blogger Style: XXXmas story

Monday, December 06, 2004

XXXmas story

Boz stood in the den looking around. He wanted the placement of the first Real World ... Blogger Style Christmas tree to be perfect and from where he stood the perfect place just happened to be where Sandra and Dvl kept their suspension harnesses and restraints. Boz knew this would be a touchy subject to deal with. Then it came to him: he could hang the devices on (and later, if the ladies wanted it, from) the tree! They would be festive and accessible. Weren't cat-o-nines better than candy canes? Boz thought so. Gloating (as usual) over his own cleverness, Boz decked the tree in leather, chrome, and rubber, trimmed it with handcuffs and paddles from his own personal stash. He discovered that bright red ball gags made cheerful ornaments (reminiscent of Rudolph and all that), and that cleverly festooned bullwhips were as good (if not better) than tinsel. As a final stroke, Boz placed a glowing phallus on the tippy tip top of the tree. Then he plugged it in. The whole tree quivered, it shook, it dropped its baby soft needles all over the carpet. The vibrator's pulsations were so powerful that soon the entire tree was balder than a bimbo with a brazilian, utterly defoliated!
"O no! " thought Boz, "I have ruined Christmas."