The Real World ... Blogger Style: S.F. vs. L.A.

Thursday, December 02, 2004

S.F. vs. L.A.

The lighting is more flattering in San Francisco. The fog acts as a soft focus filter, airbrushing one's imperfections. In LA the sun and the body culture give everyone hypersonic xray vision.

An example of why I would NEVER live in LA:

I was at Thanksgiving dinner with my family and friends and I was flirting with a guy who lives in LA. I was being fabulous, flashing him my most winning smiles, we were both a bit drunk and suddenly he leaned in, scrutinizing me. He said "do you smoke?" and I said, "sometimes, how did you know?" (I don't smell smoky, I only smoke 1 a day, hadn't had any that day) and he said, "you have a little line of nicotine stain on your teeth." I was totally crushed! I stopped smiling. He said, "I only recognize it because I had the same thing, but I had mine done." I was mortified. This is what happens to people in LA, they notice every single goddamned imperfection. I thought, shit, if he notices my teeth (I searched in the mirror for fifteen minutes and could not see what he was talking about) then what does he make of the wrinkles, flab, etc? Totally crushing. Even when you feel fabulous, if the flirtee is from LA they won't be dazzled. They'll just notice the stains on your teeth.